‘Men Fear Being Laughed At’, ‘Women Fear Being Killed’: How Complicit Attitudes Towards Misogyny Are Killing Our Youth.
As women, we’ve historically been told that we need men to ‘protect’ us, because, on our own, we are weak, vulnerable little things, at risk from all the woes of society.
How ironic.
The very same people who inform us of our need for their protection are precisely those from whom we need protecting…
In England and Wales, 92% of female murder victims were killed by men in the year ending March 2021.
The fact that so many women are dying at the hands of men is a stark reminder of just how volatile a situation it is to be a woman in the world today…
Behind every woman killed at the hands of a man, there is a trail of grief, wasted potential, missed opportunities, and unspent love…
On Wednesday morning (27/09), a 15-year-old girl (named yesterday as Elianne Andam) was stabbed to death in Croydon, South London, whilst on her way to school.
Breaking news came this morning (29/09) that a 17 year old boy has been charged with Eliannes murder (and possession of a knife). He cannot be named for legal reasons due to his age, but he awaits trial at the Old Bailey where he is due to appear on Tuesday (03/10), and will be remanded in youth detention (custody) until then.
All stabbings, all loss of lives are tragic, of course, but, this one has had a particularly profound impact on people, including people who didn’t even know Elianne…
Since this tragic (and wholly senseless) killing was reported, there have been swathes of messages of condolences coming in from people expressing their shock and horror at how this could happen.’
How could an innocent young life be so maliciously taken away on our streets?
The 17 year old boy who has been charged with Eliannes murder was reportedly known to Elianne, something which is, terrifyingly, not a surprise. The most recent data from the ONS shows that 60% of women killed in England or Wales last year (2022) knew their suspected killer.
This has opened up a conversation online surrounding femicide, and how women are made to live in fear that they won’t come home simply for rejecting a mans advances, or, as has been reported as having happened in this case, stepping in to help a friend who is trying to reject a mans advances…
On Wednesday morning, when Elianne was fatally stabbed, an argument had allegedly broken out between Elianne’s friend and her friend’s boyfriend (the murderer) while they were travelling on a bus. The boy tried to give Elianne’s friend a bouquet of flowers and a love note, but she didn’t want to know. After disembarking the bus, the argument continued as they were seen fighting over a bag containing Elianne’s friend’s belongings. A witness reported that it was in this moment that Elianne tried to get in between the pair to retrieve her friend’s belongings from the bag. With tensions running high, Elianne was fatally stabbed (multiple times) as a result.
Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them.
The only thing that men have to fear in the company of women is the embarrassment of being rejected. Women, however, have to fear being killed.
Don’t Be Complicit In Misogyny
If you’re a man, and you’re with a group of friends who are misogynistic, make your disapproval towards the attitudes they hold known…
Some men, especially teenagers who are impressionable, act from a place of wanting to earn respect from other men. They think that by objectifying women, they will earn respect within a ‘lad culture’ that ultimately promotes such misogynistic attitudes. Making it clear that you don’t want to be a part of that culture, however, means that your friends are less likely to act in such a hateful way towards women, because they have no one to impress.
Had another boy stood up for Elianne’s friend on the bus on Wednesday morning, maybe there would’ve been a different outcome. Alas, because no boy did stand up for her, Elianne did, and got herself murdered in the process…
Ultimately, we need to reform the way that men view women. We need to transform the whole essence of what ‘lad culture’ means. We need to ensure that treating women with respect and condemning misogynistic attitudes is the norm. We need to do this so that women can walk the streets and live their lives, without living in fear that their lives will be cut short at the hands of a man (or rather, at the hands of a mans warped ideas of what it means to be a ‘man’)…
ANARKISS 